Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

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yeahyeahyeah
Posts: 51
Joined: Wed May 14, 2008 2:39 pm

Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#1 Post by yeahyeahyeah »

Spent my whole early to mid twenties with an anterior open bite, and as a result, the older I get the more socially awkward I have become.

I hate the way I look basically. I hate the fact that my jawline is so assymetrical; my chin will be realigned. With myself NOT being able to smile with my teeth. I have as a result turned into a geeky guy. Always working, and being studious. My career is the only thing I have going for me atm.

I am suffering from depression as a result of all of this too. Especially since my ex gf broke up with me.

Anyway, I know no one can help, just felt that I needed to rant a bit.

Bullfighter
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Location: San Diego, CA

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#2 Post by Bullfighter »

yeahyeahyeah wrote:Spent my whole early to mid twenties with an anterior open bite, and as a result, the older I get the more socially awkward I have become.

I hate the way I look basically. I hate the fact that my jawline is so assymetrical; my chin will be realigned. With myself NOT being able to smile with my teeth. I have as a result turned into a geeky guy. Always working, and being studious. My career is the only thing I have going for me atm.

I am suffering from depression as a result of all of this too. Especially since my ex gf broke up with me.

Anyway, I know no one can help, just felt that I needed to rant a bit.
Hard to say without pics, but:

1. We all tend to notice our imperfections a lot more than others do. I look at pics of my pre-surgery bite and I think it's awful, but frankly once things were underway people were surprised that I was having braces and surgery.

2. Chin surgery makes a huge difference, so you will probably be very pleased, once the swelling subsides after a few months. A nice closed bite is even better. It's all fixable stuff.

3. A career isn't a bad thing to have in a (still mostly) crappy economy.

4. You can get a new, improved girlfriend with your new and improved jaw. :jump:

PrincessLea
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Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#3 Post by PrincessLea »

Bullfighter wrote:
yeahyeahyeah wrote:Spent my whole early to mid twenties with an anterior open bite, and as a result, the older I get the more socially awkward I have become.

I hate the way I look basically. I hate the fact that my jawline is so assymetrical; my chin will be realigned. With myself NOT being able to smile with my teeth. I have as a result turned into a geeky guy. Always working, and being studious. My career is the only thing I have going for me atm.

I am suffering from depression as a result of all of this too. Especially since my ex gf broke up with me.

Anyway, I know no one can help, just felt that I needed to rant a bit.
Hard to say without pics, but:

1. We all tend to notice our imperfections a lot more than others do. I look at pics of my pre-surgery bite and I think it's awful, but frankly once things were underway people were surprised that I was having braces and surgery.

2. Chin surgery makes a huge difference, so you will probably be very pleased, once the swelling subsides after a few months. A nice closed bite is even better. It's all fixable stuff.

3. A career isn't a bad thing to have in a (still mostly) crappy economy.

4. You can get a new, improved girlfriend with your new and improved jaw. :jump:

Well said Bullfighter!! :D

Yeahyeahyeah! I've just had surgery (1st March to fix my anterior open bite) I hadn't really paid MUCH attention to my bite before but once I became aware of it, it was all I could think about! looking back now I always wondered why people would tell me to SMILE in a sarcastic voice when I was just sitting relaxing.... my mouth was hanging open and I looked moody for no reason. Now 12 days post op my front teeth meet (with the help of elastics atm as they are retraining my muscles so I'm banded shut) I'm still not overly happy with my chin/jawline as I only had upper jaw surgery. It is better than it was and hopefully it will be even better when all the swelling goes down. If not my surgeon did discuss having a genio after if it is needed so that is an option!

Try not to let it get you down, you're being proactive and once these things are fixed you can enjoy life to the full!

scully
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Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#4 Post by scully »

Nobody's face is symmetrical without surgical intervention. If you look closely at mine, my nose actually makes a swoop down and then off to one side... Everyone's facial features go off-center a little bit. Just look at Stephen Fry's face! He looks like he's made out of clay and somebody face-palmed him! hahahahaha!

If someone with a face like Stephen Fry can be a famous comedian, (and get my vote for adorable man of the year) then personality must count for something, right? You are giving your imperfections power over you life. Don't! :) There is nothing wrong with you.

Everyone could sit in front of the mirror and count their imperfections one by one... and it's hard not to when we live in (and are stuck with) our bodies until we die. The trick is not to take the bait. We say horrible things about ourselves that we would never ever in a million years say to another human being, and it's so mean.

Try to be kinder to yourself. Ask yourself: "would I say this to that nice girl in the checkout line?" If the answer is "no", you should push the thoughts from your head right away! When you think about it, you'll be surprised at the psychological abuse we all subject ourselves to from time to time.

*hug*
Image


Mulder: Did you bring enough ice cream to share with the rest of the class?
Scully: It's not ice cream... it's non-fat tofutti rice dreamsicle.
Mulder: Ugh... I bet the air in my mouth tastes better than that.

trossi
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Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#5 Post by trossi »

I can totally relate to how you feel.
I'm 25 and this past year was horrible.
I felt really depressed about my bite and all the issues surrounding it.
I think the thing with breakups around this time, because I've talked to a few people who went through this with jaw surgery, is that its hard for the other person to understand the impact.
I've gotten into the habit of drowning myself in my education, but the more your orientate yourself with long term goals, the better you will feel.
Think about life beyond surgery, make goals of things you want to do when you're bite is fixed.
I mean the way I look at it now is that I have an opportunity to re-create myself, become the person I always wanted to be.
cheer up, things will get better :)
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yeahyeahyeah
Posts: 51
Joined: Wed May 14, 2008 2:39 pm

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#6 Post by yeahyeahyeah »

Bullfighter wrote:
yeahyeahyeah wrote:Spent my whole early to mid twenties with an anterior open bite, and as a result, the older I get the more socially awkward I have become.

I hate the way I look basically. I hate the fact that my jawline is so assymetrical; my chin will be realigned. With myself NOT being able to smile with my teeth. I have as a result turned into a geeky guy. Always working, and being studious. My career is the only thing I have going for me atm.

I am suffering from depression as a result of all of this too. Especially since my ex gf broke up with me.

Anyway, I know no one can help, just felt that I needed to rant a bit.
Hard to say without pics, but:

1. We all tend to notice our imperfections a lot more than others do. I look at pics of my pre-surgery bite and I think it's awful, but frankly once things were underway people were surprised that I was having braces and surgery.

2. Chin surgery makes a huge difference, so you will probably be very pleased, once the swelling subsides after a few months. A nice closed bite is even better. It's all fixable stuff.

3. A career isn't a bad thing to have in a (still mostly) crappy economy.
I am pleased with my career, but I guess all I really want is another meaningful relationship. That is why looks is an issue. My career is my only salvation right now, in order to improve my quality of life...way I see it, if i cant share my journey with someone else, may as well have a good life for myself.

I remember when I was dating my ex GF, she used to say things like:

"you have an amazing personality, but it's hidden. Like a building with amazing interior"

in other words, because I am not the most attractive guy ever, she was implying that is why its hidden. Really bugged me, because, yeah this sesame really doesn't help matters.

As a result extremely sensitive about the way I look, for the reasons everyone has stated in this thread. People tell me to stop acting as if I am the victim, but again, half of these people have no idea, what it is like to have a bite mallocusion. Such a frustrating journey. Hate photographs. The poster who wrote "people always tell me to smile", I get that all the time - I literally cant do it either...frustrating.

Then other cases, my therapist. Who I have seen for this issue - everytime I talk about women. He always implies that I need to get my jaw fixed in order to attract....which of course is sesame because I have been in r/ship before.

But that's it, I feel less of a man with this jaw problem, I am often down and depressed over it.

At my age - 26. I should be out there, having a care free attitude. Partying.
4. You can get a new, improved girlfriend with your new and improved jaw. :jump:
I know this is an encouraging point, but hey - if that is the case. Goes to show how shallow the world is. Which is a pretty depressing thought.

Porge
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Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#7 Post by Porge »

I have similar issues and at college felt extremely shy and insecure. I saw a therapist for social anxiety because normal things like group work or speaking in class would make me feel like I was having a heart attack!

I do think that we judge each other on looks initially. It does seem very shallow and can be a depressing thought. But, in saying that, I believe that while we judge each other on looks initially, how we really feel about each other isn't based solely upon physical aspects. Eg. I like being around people who are kind and fun, people who I share interests with.

I know from personal experience that the way I feel about my face effects my behaviour which then effects how people perceive me which I then interpret as them judging me for my face which then makes me feel more embarrassed about my face which.. You get it.

The point I am making here is that most people are not so shallow that they ONLY care about our appearances. Most people do care about what is inside.. personality and warmth and all of the things that last a lifetime. I'm certain you will find a girl who finds this in you.

yeahyeahyeah
Posts: 51
Joined: Wed May 14, 2008 2:39 pm

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#8 Post by yeahyeahyeah »

Porge wrote:I have similar issues and at college felt extremely shy and insecure. I saw a therapist for social anxiety because normal things like group work or speaking in class would make me feel like I was having a heart attack!

I do think that we judge each other on looks initially. It does seem very shallow and can be a depressing thought. But, in saying that, I believe that while we judge each other on looks initially, how we really feel about each other isn't based solely upon physical aspects. Eg. I like being around people who are kind and fun, people who I share interests with.

I know from personal experience that the way I feel about my face effects my behaviour which then effects how people perceive me which I then interpret as them judging me for my face which then makes me feel more embarrassed about my face which.. You get it.
God, so it isn't just me?

I know exactly how you feel.

I have become really quirky as a result of this orthodontics rubbish.
The point I am making here is that most people are not so shallow that they ONLY care about our appearances. Most people do care about what is inside.. personality and warmth and all of the things that last a lifetime. I'm certain you will find a girl who finds this in you.
[/quote]


Yeah, I hope so.

dayeangphurr
Posts: 86
Joined: Thu Oct 23, 2008 10:49 am

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#9 Post by dayeangphurr »

Hi yeahyeahyeah,

I can relate to the way you feel too. A huge (social) problem for me is that I'm so ("physically") uncomfortable with myself that it makes it difficult for me to be comfortable around other people; then I just become awkward. And a lot of it is due to being self-conscious about my appearance--which is incredibly distracting and exhausting. I'm so sick of stressing over something so "shallow" - I just feel like the quality of my life is getting the short end of the stick here.

I wish I could easily "drown myself into my education"--but I can't seem to do that either.

sarahn
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:19 pm

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#10 Post by sarahn »

I can totally relate too. I have been called ugly all my life and live as an outcast. There are more than one thing wrong with my face: I have a 9mm overbite, my nose got crooked after an injury and I have deep red acne scars. Sometimes I worry that I will never look "normal". I have a hard time just looking at myself in the mirror. I don't have BBD, other people tell me I look bad so its not in my head.

treevernal
Posts: 108
Joined: Thu Apr 02, 2009 7:33 pm

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#11 Post by treevernal »

People who make fun of your appearance are jerks (I'd use another word, but I don't think it's allowed on here :P). I, too, was told I looked like a turtle through high school and college (even once by my own mother!) due to how out of balance my face is (very small, recessive jaws). They all claimed they were kidding and that it was all in jest, but in reality, things like that hurt. The best you can do is think abou the things about yourself that you like (maybe you're a good friend, a kind person, or are killer at the drums). In any case, there are "jerks" everywhere; don't let them get you down. Nothing wrong with wanting to improve your appearance, but you need to find your own value in other areas as well. It can take time, but it will happen.

Summertimeolive
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Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#12 Post by Summertimeolive »

yeahyeahyeah wrote:Spent my whole early to mid twenties with an anterior open bite, and as a result, the older I get the more socially awkward I have become.

I hate the way I look basically. I hate the fact that my jawline is so assymetrical; my chin will be realigned. With myself NOT being able to smile with my teeth. I have as a result turned into a geeky guy. Always working, and being studious. My career is the only thing I have going for me atm.

I am suffering from depression as a result of all of this too. Especially since my ex gf broke up with me.

Anyway, I know no one can help, just felt that I needed to rant a bit.
Yeahyeahyeah, I feel your pain and understand where your coming from. I'm the same age as you, and my relationship of 8 years ended on a very very bad note recently. He was establishing himself as a photographer and the light bulb really clicked when he never took a SINGLE photo of me, but offered lots of other women friends/nightclub people photo opportunities to build his portfolio. He typically told me I was beautiful, but one day was like ' why do you do that thing with your chin it looks gross.' As someone who was taunted most of her life for gummy smile and teeth, its not fun and if anything you want to avoid people our age, because when they make cheapshots its ALWAYS to appearance, and it further damages your mindset. Your gf should never have said that about you, thats just hurtful.

I will say this, I know its hard because your so upset with so many components of your life right now, but you have one puzzle piece together, a good career and you seem very bright. The rest will fall into place, trust me... As much as I hate to say this, appearance plays a role in how we see ourselves, how we project ourselves, our confidence and such. Please consult with an maxillofacial surgeon and get their professional opinion and move forward, dont let this one thing ruin the rest of your life, so not worth it.

The BEST advice anyone has given me was last night when I was moping about my life and my current condition, I hope it makes you feel better too

"Get out there...stop worrying about it all, Smile and think of all the ways your glass is half full! Your just starting out, you have a great education, have a great personality, and the world is yours for the taking!!!"

bloggerg4
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 2:11 pm

Re: Anterior open bite has ruined my social life....

#13 Post by bloggerg4 »

You anterior open bite can be fixed with the NEW Invisalighn G4. My anterior open bite didn't ruin my life but it has kept me from smiling. Now i smile all the time without biting (which i never did before) because I am in the middle of my treatment and saw results. Soon I will be able to smile after my bite is closed.

Start invisalign treatment for your open bite. they are invisible, no one notices them. DO something about your problem! You can be happy with your smile in as little as 1 year.

If you want proof, I have piPICTURES OF MY PROGRESS WITH INVISALIGN for anterior open bite on my blog. I only hope this helps you to make a decision as to starting treatment. Since we are not aloud to post links on this forum, I have seperated the link into parts but please be aware that there are no spaces in the link ...for when you type it into the adress bar on your browser.

http: //invisaligng4. blogspot. com/

Best of luck to you.

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